Last night was my 10th game at Citi Field, and the first one where the most adequate description of the game was provided repeatedly by a guy sitting about 5 seats to the right of El Guapo and myself. Primarily in the first two innings of the game, and also sprinkled several times throughout the remaining 7 innings, he let us and just about everyone know his feelings in succinct fashion.
"YER TERRIBLE!!!" was his opinion. For what it's worth, he was right.
This isn't to say that El Guapo or I were somehow encouraged by the specter of a Dan Haren/Nelson Figueroa pitching matchup. But we thought that Nelson Figueroa would take the mound and at least perform at some sort of competitive level. Sadly, this was not the case. Basically, we witnessed the career of Nelson Figueroa die. I don't think there's any other way you could put it. Words like pitiful come to mind, but I think that about sums it up. After 4 pitches, Arizona led 1-0. Mark Reynolds and Miguel Montero hit Home Runs so far that it looked like the ball had been set on a tee. One inning later, Reynolds tagged another rocket. Figueroa wasn't just not fooling anyone. This was an absolute embarrassment. It was TERRIBLE!!! The DBacks just beat him so mercilessly it was like they knew what was coming. Every bit of contact was a solid shot. And after 53 pitches, the 6 runs and 10 hits told the story. And thus, we figured, it was time to sit back, wait for the beer guy to come around and hope that the Mets just took their hacks and got us out of there quick. The guy down the row was right, this game was TERRIBLE!!! So TERRIBLE!!! that I suggested we make it into a drinking game. Take a drink whenever this guy said something was TERRIBLE!!! El Guapo was skeptical. It had every opportunity to be a bad idea.
Oddly, though, the Mets sort of got themselves back into the game. They plated a run in the 3rd on an Angel Pagan triple, though he was stranded at 3rd by Luis Castillo, who put forth an at-bat that was TERRIBLE!!! and David Wright did the same. In the 5th, they struck quickly and quietly, and really out of nowhere. Cora and Santos started things off and following a Pagan walk, Castillo atoned with a 2-run single and Wright followed with an RBI single of his own. And here was Sheffield, who, with one good shot could actually give the Mets the lead. And Sheffield hit a good shot, but unfortunately, it was right at Reynolds, who went around the horn for a DP that killed the rally, more or less killed the Mets chances and was TERRIBLE!!!
I guess you can commend the Mets bullpen, which did an outstanding job of mopping up Figueroa's mess. Redding, Parnell, Feliciano and Stokes got through the rest of the game only allowing 3 hits to the DBacks and allowing the Mets to chip away enough to make the game somewhat respectable. But as has been the case all too often for the Mets, they get that rally-killing DP and never really recover. Murphy hit a HR in the 6th to cut the deficit to 6-5. Sheffield doubled in the 8th, but got no further. Francoeur swung at the first pitch and grounded out to end the inning, which prompted the gentleman to the right to scream and yell, but not use the one adjective that properly described the situation: TERRIBLE!!!
At least the game was quick. I hadn't been out to Citi Field in almost a month, but I see that the promotional staff has been hard at work thinking up insipid new things. One such thing was a karaoke contest, which featured two girls truly butchering an Alicia Keys song. Both such performances were properly described as TERRIBLE!!! by our friend to the right. Later in the game, when the voting results were revealed, he immediately dismissed the outcome as TERRIBLE!!! But all things considered, it was only TERRIBLE!!! enough to get us through 2 beers each.
However, there was one thing that made it all better. El Guapo and I were discussing food options while riding out to the game. He had mentioned that he had tried Blue Smoke at his last trip and said it was pretty good. He wanted to try the El Verano Taqueria. I've gone on record as saying I'm not much of a taco person, but I was willing to give it a try (Jason at Faith and Fear also gave it high marks). And I'm quite glad I did. Shake Shack is good, but this place is a hidden gem. I went for the Combo Taco Platter, which features a Chicken taco, a Pork taco and a Beef taco for $9.50. It looks small, but it's surprisingly substantial. All I'll say is DAMN! That's some good eatins' right there. The masses can wait on line at Shake Shack all they want. I'll go for the tacos. I'm convinced and converted. It's kind of a sad commentary on the team, but the tacos were by far and away the highlight of the evening. Good enough that El Guapo and I deemed the evening satisfactory.
The food better be good. That's sort of all you can look forward to now, because the team is TERRIBLE!!!