Saturday, July 14, 2007

Congratulations, Keith Hernandez's Mustache

At some point during Friday night's loss to the Reds, Shea's video screen cut to a shot of Gary Cohen in the booth wearing a fake mustache followed by similar shots of several SNY cameramen wearing similar 'staches. Later, one of the many clap-clap-clap "Let's go Mets!" chants was accompanied by a loop of cartoon Gary and Ron slapping the 'stache off of Keith's face from that weirdest of the SNY commercials. What the hell was going on? Mets2Moon and I were stumped and too grumpy with the proceedings of the game to give it much thought. The next morning, I remembered: Newsday has been running a bracket contest about the best mustaches in New York sports history. The finalists were Keith and Don Mattingly. Keith must have won, explaining the 'stache-fest at Shea. Sure enough, he did.

Donny Baseball's soup strainer is gone now, and Keith's benefits from performance enhancing substances (Just for Men), but that is a solid final round.

We already know quite a bit about Keith's mustache's résumé: the .296 career average, 11 straight Gold Gloves, two rings, two Silver Sluggers, sharing the 1979 NL MVP with Willie Stargell, and making out with Elaine Benes. But there's a lot of Keith's mustache I bet you didn't know:
  • Finished third in the 1994 New York City mayoral election with 12% of the vote
  • Made a killing in dot com stocks; got out before the bubble burst
  • Completed the Boston Marathon in 3:06:32
  • Authored bestselling memoir, The Whiskers of My Discontent
  • An ace at sodoku
Yes, friends, that is indeed an impressive mustache.

(And of course, happy Ralph Kiner Day, everyone.)

Mustache Madness - Great Mustaches in New York sports [Newsday]